Category Archives: lovepost

Love Week: Rachel – ‘Moving & Marriage’

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Yesterday was our 10th Wedding Anniversary and it was so lovely! I cannot wait to share all the photos with you guys.  Thank you so much for all the lovely comments, messages, and tweets!  I look forward to responding to you all. One person who always responds to me is Rachel, my guest blogger for today for the continuation of Love Week.  As a busy wife and mum I know how time consuming blogging can be (though I love it!) but Rachel some how manages to do it all.  I love her big heart and her loving spirit.  She has the cutest two little doggies whom I follow as a vicarious pet owner.  I was drawn to her having lived an Expat life and love to view her amazing travel photographs.  She is definitely someone I hope to plan a future blate with so I can hear about her travel experiences in person and perhaps make friends with her dogs. :)  Thank you so much Rachel for taking the time to be apart of this Love Week Series!  

Hi, everyone! I’m Rachel and I blog over at Postcards from Rachel, and I’m very excited to be guest posting for Bonnie while she renews her vows in Wales! Since this week’s posts are centered around love and relationships, I figured I’d discuss how moving abroad impacted my marriage and what I’ve learned from the experience. But first, let me give you a brief timeline of events.

B and I met at a happy hour in Washington, DC while he was working in finance and I was working on the Hill. Okay, okay… so it wasn’t exactly a happy hour because it was late and I was a little really tipsy, but that sounds better than saying we met at a bar, right? Right. Anyway, things obviously worked out because one year later we were engaged to be married. While I was trying to plan a long-distance wedding and juggle a Congressman’s schedule, B brought up the idea of moving abroad for his job. I was overwhelmed and had just experienced my first panic attack at work, and honestly, quitting my job to move abroad to Scotland sounded like a fairytale. And a good excuse to take it easy for a while.

We got married in the Midwest, left for our honeymoon, returned to DC a week later, and started hauling all of our belongings to a storage unit in Virginia. I had my last day of work and a few days later we hopped on a plane to the UK. This all happened in about three weeks.  
Because everything happened so quickly and we still needed to find a place to live in Scotland, we fought. A lot. Living out of a suitcase in a cramped hotel room for two weeks wasn’t my idea of newlywed bliss and I had a difficult time adjusting to unemployment. Eventually we found an apartment and things got a little easier, but I found myself not wanting to get out of bed. I didn’t realize the move would have such a negative impact on me.
I felt out of place, I missed my friends and family and most of all, I was completely bored. While I was working in DC, I didn’t really have any hobbies, so I didn’t know what to do with my time in Scotland. Because I was sad, I contemplated returning home. When I realized going back wouldn’t work, I took out my frustration on my husband. He worked long hours and I was constantly alone so I blamed him.
Then one day things changed. We suddenly realized that since we were living in a foreign country without any support from our loved ones, we needed to be each other’s biggest cheerleaders. We learned to rely on one another, worked on our communication skills, and helped each other through rough patches during our expat adventures. We planned date nights and vacations, talked about our future and before I knew it, B became my best friend once again.
Even though expat life was hard, it was the best thing that could have happened to us as a couple. Would we have learned this much about each other in DC while we were both working full-time? Eventually, yes. But because we were thrown into this situation, we developed a stronger trust.
It’s been almost two years since our wedding. We’re still moving around, we still have our ups and downs, and we continue to grow.
Do you have a similar story?
@postcardsrachel